How to Address An Invitation to an Officer
(Who Is an M.D.) & His Spouse's Name?
      My fiance and I are having a terrible time addressing some of our envelopes for our wedding. We have a number of high-ranking military officials that are retired and are medical doctors.
      For example we have a three star retired general (US Army) -- a Lieutenant General who is a physician.
      How do I write this: Lieutenant General James Doe, MD, Retired and Mrs. Janice Doe???
      Does Mrs. Janice Doe go on another line I would assume?
      We are including the women's names on our envelopes because I am a bit of a feminist and hate the idea of leaving off any reference to the woman's identity.
      Thanks for your help!
        -- Carrie Worsham

Dear Ms. Worsham,
    The most formal forms, e.g. how The White House would address an invitation to a Lieutenant General and his wife.  (BTW, they use my book.)
    1) No M.D.: You never use an academic degree with a military rank.
    2) The name of the person with the rank goes first.
    3) You can address your wedding invitations however you like, but as you infer it's traditional that when a couple uses the same last name ... and the woman uses "Mrs." ... woman's first name is not included.    
    Traditionally use of Mrs. (first name) + (last name) indicates a woman is divorced -- e.g., it's how she would be listed on a wedding invitation if they were no longer married, but she and her former husband were hosting the wedding.
    4) Branch of service and retired status are not used on social correspondence.
        So on the mailing envelope:
            Lieutenant General James Doe
                and Mrs. Doe
                    (address)
        And on the inside envelope you use 'conversational forms":
            General Doe and Mrs. Doe
       Or if they are family or very close friends
            Jim and Janice
            Uncle Jim and Aunt Janice
            -- Robert Hickey

How to Officially Write the Name of A Retired Navy Physician?
     I am framing a photo for my husband Robert who was at the time the photo was taken a recently retired medical doctor (Captain) from the U. S. Navy.  If I include a label below the photo, should it say, name-rank-M.D., or rank-name-M.D or only rank-name?
    I would sincerely appreciate any wisdom you could lend to my dilemma.
        -- Janice Larsen

Dear Ms. Larsen,
    As a medical officer the US Navy the official form of his name would be:
        Captain Robert Larsen, Medical Corps, USN, Ret.
            -- Robert Hickey

How to Address a Military Physician On an Invitation?
    My fiance has a friend who is a medical doctor who is also on active duty with a rank of Captain in the Air Force, where he practices medicine.  How should we address the wedding invitation? 
          -- Carol B.

Dear Carol B.:
    All active-duty armed service personnel are addressed as:
               (Rank) + (Name)
    For a written address, there are different forms for "official" and "social" correspondence: I cover that in detail in my chapter on Forms of Address for US Armed Services in my book.  Here's the answer:
    On social correspondence post-nominal abbreviations are not used ... thus there no USAF and MSC with his name.
    A wedding invitation's mailing envelope uses the social form:
               Captain William Blake
                  Address
    If you are using inside envelopes, the form is to use you would call him, and most formally that would be:
                Captain Blake
    He might identify himself as Dr. as he enters an exam room where the patient sits in a backless paper gown ... But in the military, the etiquette is to address all personnel by rank ... one's rank is the most important information: how one serves is important, but is of secondary importance.
          -- Robert Hickey

How to List a Military Physician On a Program?
        I recently attended a funeral for a retired Rear Admiral who was also a Navy doctor. Was it proper to refer to him in on the cover of the program as:

      Was that correct?
              -- Vic M. in Pew #44
 
Dear Vic M.:
     Correct by U.S. Department of Defense guidelines would have been:
             RADM (full name), Medical Corps, USN
     1) Abbreviating "Rear Admiral" to the military abbreviation RADM is standard at military events.
     2) In the official form of address, branch of service follows the name, in this case -- Medical Corps, USN.
     3) There's a rule no academic degree is used with a military rank -- so M.D. -- or any other academic post-nominal abbreviation never follows a name preceded by a rank. ... so never use Captain (full name), MBA,  General (full name), JD or Major General (full name), PhD.
     4) Finally, in the armed services everyone is addressed and identified by rank. How they serve is important (in this case as a doctor) but by their rank is how their name is written.
           -- Robert Hickey