Honor & Respect: The Official Guide to Names, Titles, and Forms of Address by Robert Hickey, Deputy Director, The Protocol School of Washington



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HONOR & RESPECT

 

Deceased Persons
Blog of Questions & Answers


Site updated by Robert Hickey on September 1, 2010

How To List a Deceased Hostess on an Invitation?        
How To Write a Name on a Posthumously Presented Certificate?       
How To Refer to a Deceased Employer on my Resume?       
How To Refer to a Deceased Military Officer?       
When to Refer to a Deceased Person as "The Late"

How to Refer to a Deceased Employer?    
   How do I refer to my deceased employer, a U.S. Senator, on my resume?
     -- Beth Acorn

Dear Ms. Acorn,
    I am not sure why it's necessary to mention that your former employer is deceased on your resume. Seems odd, but, spans of the years of life are included sometimes:
       
The Honorable John Tower, Senator of Texas (1925-1991) ...
    Or in text when someone has just recently died:
        The late John Tower, Senator of Texas...
    Or span of life is included when the reader might not know when an individual lived:
        Ordo Virtutum, written by Hildegard of Bingen (1098-1179), is an early example of ...
     But I think you should leave out that he is deceased: On your resume it only matters that you are still alive!
         -- Robert Hickey

When to Refer to a Deceased Person as "The Late"?
Mr. Hickey:
    In writing the history of our non-profit organization should we refer to the founders, now deceased, as the late John Smith?
 
     --- Darla Snyder

Ms. Snyder:
      Usually "the late" precedes a name of someone who just died ... to clarify he or she would have participated, but died and someone else participated in their place. "John Smith, the bride's uncle, gave her away at the wedding in place of her father the late Thomas Smith."
    In a "history" I suggest you use a timeless style that will be accurate today and in 100 years when all of the organization's founders will be
the late. So, just refer to everyone as (first + surname).
    I
f you want to include more about their lifespans you could list founders and board members elsewhere in the document with the appropriate years --  (1948-1999) -or- (1955 -       ) -- after their name.
            -- Robert Hickey

How Do I List a Deceased Hostess on an Invitation?
Dear Mr. Hickey:
    I have a quick question that I am hoping you might be able to answer. A baby shower was to be hosted by two individuals. Regretfully, one of the individuals passed away about a week ago. The family asks that the deceased still be listed on the invitation. How would you incorporate her name ....
     Posthumously Caroline Giles
          or
    The Late Caroline Giles
 Please advise
?
         --- Helen Carley

Dear Ms. Carley:
   I don't think I've ever heard of a deceased person issuing an invitation! Sometimes events are dedicated to a deceased person:

In memory of Caroline Giles
Helen Carley
requests the pleasure of you company
at a baby shower for
Hilda Smith
etc.

But that's still very odd since the event is already in honor of the expectant mother. Sometimes deceased persons are sometimes listed with (years of their life) after their names, like:
Helen Carley
and Caroline Giles (1937-2010)
request the pleasure of your company
at a baby shower for
Hilda Smith
etc.

But what I think you should do is to extend the invitation alone. THEN open the event with a welcome toast that would be a loving remembrance ... such as ... I cannot welcome you today without saying that as we gather to celebrate of the joyous start of a new life -- we also celebrate a another life well lived -- that of Caroline Giles. Caroline an I were to jointly host this event and nothing would have brought her more joy than to see this wonderful gathering of friends and family ..... etc.
          -- Robert Hickey

How to Refer to a Deceased Military Officer?
    Sir, what is the correct written form of address for a retired US Army Colonel who is now deceased? The family hosts a golf tournament in his honor for the benefit of the Wounded Warrior Project and Operation Homefront.  I have been tasked with developing an accompanying website and graphic materials. I would like to use the proper designation for him. I have received several varying suggestions from various persons involved, all of whom are military or retired military who insist their version is correct though all versions are different to some degree. Thank you kindly for your  assistance.
             -- James Costello

Dear Mr. Costello,
 
  I can understand why you are getting mixed opinions ... there are rules about addressing the living ... but when writing the name of the deceased you are referring to them in the third person ... not addressing them directly ... so those rules don't technically apply.
     But that said .... Department of Defense (DOD) manuals suggest to address a retired officer there are three acceptable formal forms for official correspondence:
          Colonel Jamie Abbott, USA, Retired
          COL Jamie Abbott, USA, Retired
          Colonel Jamie Abbott, USA Ret.
          COL Jamie Abbott, USA Ret.

     1) comma after USA when "Retired" is spelled out
     2) no comma after USA when when abbreviated "Ret.
     3) "COL" is the service-specific abbreviation for an Army colonel used within the services .... Air Force and Marine Colonels having slightly different abbreviations ..... but these are generally not used by civilians, although they are free to do so.
     However since this is a golf tournament and not an official military function ... I suggest you use the social form suggested by the DOD which excludes both the branch of service and the active/retired status
          Colonel Jamie Abbott
     If there is a bio in the program somewhere, you could state he served in the the United States Army from XXXX to XXXX .... etc.
     I know they have a copy of my book at the Wounded Warrior Project in Florida ... because Margie Kelly, a graduate of The Protocol School of Washington® and etiquette consultant based in Georgia and Maine volunteers there and gave them one.

     
       -- Robert Hickey

How to Write a Name on a Posthumous Certificate?
       How would I address a Certificate of Appreciation given to someone who has died?  Do I address it as "The Late John Smith" or do I address it as "In memory of John Smith"?  Please help.  Thanks.

    -- Sue in Essex County


Dear Sue:
    
If you are presenting it to his family... they likely have other framed diplomas and certificates with his name on them.  I would not refer the fact that he is dead … just put his name on the certificate. Write something like....

In Appreciation of
John Smith


For Exemplary Service to the Citizens of Essex County

The Twenty Third Day of June, Two Thousand Ten

Robert Thompson, Mayor


     If the certificate is dated ... historians will figure out that it was presented posthumously.
         -- Robert Hickey


Not Finding Your Question Answered?
Below are other topics covered in my blog.  If you don't see your question answered send me an e-mail. I am pretty fast at sending a reply and if I think It would be of interest to others, I will post the question and the answer with all the names and personal specifics removed.
                    -- Robert Hickey

USE OF NAMES & HONORIFICS   
Mr., Miss, Jr., III, & Names        
Married Women       
Deceased Persons         
People with Two Titles
Post-Nominal Abbreviations and Initials           
Joint Forms of Address    (How do you write two names?)   

USE OF SPECIFIC OFFICIAL TITLES        
Former Officials            
Professionals and Academics        
United States Federal Officials             
United States State Officials              
United States Municipal Officials             
       All About The Honorable with U.S. Officials         
       Former United States Officials            
United States Armed Services             
       Retired U.S. Armed Service Officers
Tribal Officials             
Clergy and Religious Officials           
Canadian Officials         
Australian Officials          
British Officials, Royalty, and Nobility        
Diplomats and International Representatives
           
Foreign National Officials and Nobility        

SPECIFIC SITUATIONS
Etiquette             
Flags: Traditions and Protocol             
Introductions
            
Invitations: Writing & Addressing
        
Invitations: Just Armed Service Personnel        
Names on Programs, Signs, & on Lists           
Place Cards            

Precedence: Ordering Officials           
Thank You Notes             


Site updated by Robert Hickey on September 1, 2010



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Robert Hickey is the author of Honor & Respect:
The Official Guide to Names, Titles, and Forms of Address
Published by The Protocol School of Washington®
Foreword by Pamela Eyring

Copyright © 2010 Robert Hickey.     All Rights Reserved.
Book Photo: Marc Goodman.




All information on www.formsofaddress.info is copyright © 2010 by Robert Hickey.
The Protocol School of Washington® is registered in the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office.
Honor & Respect is dedicated to Dorothea Johnson, Founder of The Protocol School of Washington®