How to Address a Roman Catholic Deacon?
         Having attended Catholic school for many years, I was sure that we had had some deacons/seminarians in high school who were called Reverend Mr. ___. With some Googling I have found this is the correct form of address used for a deacon who is preparing to be ordained a priest, who is called a “transitional deacon.”
        What do you think of this advice? 
        So my question today is how to address a deacon on the outside envelope. We are addressing some some beautiful Crane’s wedding invitations that have to be just perfect!
                   – Chris Wilder, Syosset, New York

Dear Ms. Wilder:
       People I've consulted with in the Roman Catholic hierarchy have the opinion that there are two types of Roman Catholic deacons — Permanent Deacons who are not addressed as “The Reverend.” … and Transitional Deacons {seminary graduates on their way to becoming priests} who are addresses as "The Reverend".  So that would suggest you will need to find out which type of deacon you are inviting.
       TRANSITIONAL DEACON
              Outside envelope for an invitation:
                     The Reverend Mr. (Full Name)
                     (Address)
              Inside envelope for an invitation:
                     Deacon (Surname)
       PERMANENT DEACON
              Outside envelope for an invitation:
                     Deacon (Full Name)
                     (Address)
              Inside envelope for an invitation:
                    Deacon (Surname)
Here’s what I think:
       1) Always use The Reverend … not just Reverend. It is a courtesy title used just like The Honorable would be used a U.S. elected official ... with a The and always preceding a full name.
       2) The use of  The Reverend + Mr.  is REALLY unusual in the United States. In the US we don’t use duplicate honorifics. The American tradition is to use just one courtesy title or honorific before the name. E.g., a Navy Captain who is also a physician is not addressed as “Captain Dr. (name).” or a member of the House of Representatives who is an PhD would not be "The Honorable Dr. (name)."
       Double titles are typical in the UK, and when people tell me of such a form ("Reverend Mr.”), I always wonder if their source isn’t a British (Church of England) style guide?  While I’ve seen The Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. here and there … it is not what they use that at The King Center in Atlanta. They use The Reverend Martin Luther King, Jr. and Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.  He was a The Reverend and he held a doctorate, but used one honorific or courtesy title at a time.
       Note to other readers: I am interested in hearing from you if you have an opinion.  (See two of the notes below from others.)
       — Robert Hickey
                 PS: I am glad you like your Crane’s invitations.
                           Pamela Eyring and I updated the new edition of the Crane’s Blue Book of Stationery.

Dear Mr. Hickey,
       As a deacon, I can tell you that in the Diocese of Trenton (and other NJ dioceses I believe), there are two standards:
              Permanent Deacons are addressed: Deacon__________
              Transitional Deacons are addressed Reverend Mr.________
       I believe this is fairly consistent throughout the US.
              – Deacon Kevin

Dear Mr. Hickey:
       Get real – why are we splitting hairs? In the Roman Catholic church we do have “transitional” and “permanent” deacons – but the ministry is the same. Therefore you address either deacon the same. Formal address is Reverend Mr. Casual is simply Deacon. The transitional deacon will go on to priestly ordination and become Reverend.. and casually addressed as Father. Permanent deacons remain as they were. Same ministry – same title – no difference – only the length of time in that ministry.
              – Deacon Dale

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For forms of address for invitations, place cards, name badges, introductions, conversation, and all other formal uses, see Honor & Respect: the Official Guide to Names, Titles, and Forms of Address.

Copyright © 2012 Robert Hickey.     All Rights Reserved.
Photo: Marc Goodman.